The Next Step

Movies and TV shows have put a certain expectation on the emotions associated with choosing to move in with your significant other.

Take Grey's Anatomy, Season 2, Episode 10:
Cristina finds a key in her coffee cup in the morning

And then when she tells Mer, it's a big deal.
"Burke keyed you?"
"I got freakin' keyed before coffee"

Not only that, but Cristina feels like this a huge next step, one they're perhaps not ready for. Considering they were broken up for a bit at the beginning of the season (and this is only episode 10), I'd say maybe things are moving a bit fast for C and B... but it's a TV show - and those tend to dramatize things.

Still, I thought moving in with my boyfriend would be a big deal - something really ground breaking. And it wasn't. At the risk of sounding a bit robotic and a bit like Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory, it was the logical next step. We had been long distance for three years, we had both recently graduated college and were ready to start being real adults with real jobs - so why not do that in the same city? And if I'm going to move half way across the country - I'm not going to live with a random roommate. Like I said, logical.

Now, don't get me wrong - I love living with him. But the act of doing so was a little boring, almost nonchalant. There were no fireworks, I didn't build him a house made out of candles to prove I was ready... we just did it, we packed up and moved in together. Sometimes I have to say to myself "we live together now" because maybe this time it'll be a big deal. Instead, it always just seems so normal.

And maybe that's not a bad thing. If it were such a big deal, we'd constantly be striving to maintain that kind of excitement in our lives. But instead, we get to build a life together.

Making Goals

During your time in school, you'll usually come across teachers who assign a "goal-making" project.

What are your goals for this project?

What are your goals for the semester?

Did you achieve your goals?

Why or why not?

And they talk about how you shouldn't set your goals too high, and you should have an action plan on how you're going to achieve your goals (a goal to reach your goal?).

So, I took their advice - and that of my Erin Condren planner - and made goals for November.

I'll be blogging more about my wonderful planner later, but for now - let's focus on goals!

As you can see, at first I was very vague with my goals - just a general "what do I want to accomplish in November?" Then I went back and gave each goal a value. If I simply plan to blog "more," posting once would certainly accomplish that. But, I want to create habits - so I'm quantifying it with once per week. Furthermore, I counted how many weeks are in November, and planned blog posts for each week so there can be no excuses!

Knitting was hard to quantify - if I receive orders for Ashlyn's Point, it might change how many things I knit (for example I can knit multiple coffee cozy's in a day, but would need a few days to complete a bigger project). So, I simply plan to try and knit something each week. My goal in October was to promote Ashlyn's Point with more Facebook posts. I feel I've gotten in a pretty good habit of doing so and will continue this through November!

Running - I have a free gym membership at Planet Fitness, but I never use it! I want to get back in shape, and stay active, so I plan to work on my cardio by running at the gym three times per week. At first I was going to try for being able to run 5K by Thanksgiving, but decided that I should take it slow, so I wouldn't discourage myself. I'm using the app "10K Runner" which encourages running 3 times per week.

Finally, I want to read more. I've been reading the 4th Game of Thrones book since about February. And am only half way through! And my "books to read" list just keeps growing. As does my "movies to see" list - since half of them are also books, which I'd like to read first. So, I plan to read at least three times per week!

So, those are my November goals - and how I've quantified them. As for a "goal for accomplishing my goal" - checking in with these weekly.

Did I make progress this week?

If not, how will I adjust next week so I can better work towards my goals?

If so, what did I do that allowed me to work on them and how do I imitate that next week?